expat

MATERNITY LEAVE IS NOT A PAID VACATION

July 17, 2018 by Little Miss Honey 233 Comments

My friends would message me when I was on my maternity leave how lucky I am that I get to rest from work and relax all day at home. I do feel lucky I get to spend more time with kids. However, I may have rested from office work but juggling 2 constantly fighting toddlers and a fussy newborn can be challenging. We all know how tired a mommy can get be with a new baby while recuperating from child birth, and in my case, caesarean operation. Though I feel blessed and happy that I was given opportunity to spend extra amount of time to be with them but I hope people would not easily assume that my maternity leave was like a fully paid luxury spa trip. I need it to allow my body to regain its energy from my 38weeks of being pregnant. I need it so my body can recuperate from child birth and allow my painful caesarean tear to heal nicely. I need it to spend time to bond with my new baby. I need it to give extra play time, constant hugging and story time with my two toddlers so they wouldn’t feel like all my love attention is now only for their new brother. I need it so I can breastfeed my baby, do unlimited latching and constant skin-to-skin contact to encourage good breastmilk production. I need it so I can get some extra time to experience how it would feel to be a proper housewife by waking up my husband to work, making his breakfast, cooking dinner and happily filling him up on the funny cute things the kids did for the day when he gets home with both of us lying in bed to rest before we eat dinner. I need it so I can tutor my firstborn who is going to school and go for parent-teacher meetings. I need it so I can organised our home and our files & paper clutter which I can never do when I was working. I need it so I can create a daily routine for my kids which my helper would follow when I start working. I need it so I can see my eldest boy off to school when his school bus fetch him at home. I need it so I can get to have funny conversations and tickle fest with my second-born. It is wonderful and challenging at the same time. It is still work in a way. But a work that I wouldn’t mind doing and it is definitely worth it. Yes, like most jobs you would still have to do time-management, practice patience and resilience, must multi-task, learn negotiating skills (especially to a strong-willed toddler), conduct captivating presentations (like storytelling and leverage on your other talents like cooking, singing, dancing & drawing.

So no, it is not a luxury spa or a paid holiday. Mommies also put in loads of work (and loads of laundry) during maternity leave. It is not an easy breezy phase in a mom’s life. That is why she needs to take a break from her current livelihood to work on just this – “Being A Mom”. And don’t scoff on that “Being A Mom” statement. All mommies would agree that it is the hardest work out there.

I believe that it is essential for all mommies who just given birth to have an adequate maternity leave to just concentrate for the next few months to be just a mom. (But please don’t neglect your husbands too. Be a wife too. That is as important as being a mom. Because you need to care for your partner to build good building blocks to nurture your kids.) If you don’t believe me why maternity leave is so important. Go watch Ali Wong’s Hard-Knock Wife on Netflix. She is on point and so hilarious.

Despite its bits of struggle and agony, I still wish maternity leave would last for 6 months. Some even advocate maternity leave to be as long as 1 year.

My maternity leave has ended and I started working this Monday. I am entitled to 8 weeks maternity leave (which includes weekends & public holidays) as a foreigner employee. I added 3 more weeks to stay home with my boys, using my annual leave. I learned that in the United States, under the Family and Medical Leave Act, you are entitled to 12 weeks of unpaid leave for the birth of your child. In France, as long as you are covered by the French social security system, you can take 16 weeks of maternity leave with full pay, and up to 26 weeks if you are having your third child. In Denmark, parents can receive a total of 52 weeks of paid leave per child from the government. In the U.K., paid maternity leave can extend to six months. I learned Oman expats are given 50 days paid leave.

I couldn’t bare to part with my kids just yet inspite my body’s occasional quiet screaming for a break or an alone time. Those days of me as a (temporary) stay-at-home full-time mom were blessings to me. I enjoy being with my 3 little boys. I love to seeing their happy faces when they wake up and see me still lying beside them in bed. They would often give us a cheerful “Good morning Mommy & Daddy!” or sometimes if they are still quite sleepy, they would snuggle closer to me, to give me a hug with a smile on their faces. (Yes, we co-sleep our 3 boys. I might get scolding from those who are anti-co-sleeping. But this works for us so please let us be.) It is nice to have time to be with my kids. I get to play with them, talk to them, watch movies with them, tutor Naj in his school work, breastfeed Zeke the whole day, nap with Fynn and get unlimited hugs & kisses through out the day.

On my first day of work, when my eldest got home from school at 3:30 PM, he hurriedly ask our helper, “Is Mommy home already?” I left early to work with them sleeping and I got back home & they were already asleep. (My workplace is so far away from our home.) Yesterday, I managed to get home earlier than my 1st day back to work. My two elder boys saw me from the glass window of our unit and they were screaming excitedly like their Super Hero character in the flesh, “‘Mommy! Mommy!” They ran to the front door to open the door for me. Upon getting a hug and a kiss from Naj and Fynn, I took Zeke who is squirming from my helper’s carrier. I learned Zeke does not like my expressed milk or formula milk that much. So I breastfeed him automatically, before I did anything else at home. Awww, my boys are adjusting too with me going back to work.

Maternity Leave is a necessary leave that should be given to mothers to provide adequate attention for her newborn (& other kids) and allow adequate time a proper recuperation & for mothers to regain back their strength that was lost during pregnancy and delivery. But no, it is definitely not a paid luxurious vacation.

Expat mommies around the world, how long are your paid maternity leave entitlement?

EXPAT DIARIES: HEATHER, CEO OF FINE PALATE

March 31, 2017 by Little Miss Honey 27 Comments

“(Wikipedia) ‘An Expatriate (often shortened to Expat) is a person temporarily or permanently residing in a country other than that of their citizenship. The word comes from the Latin terms ex (“out of”) and patria (“country, fatherland”).

This blog aims to discover people who are adventurers like me, venturing out in a new place to call home and creating memories. I have previously lived with my parents and siblings in the Saudi Arabia when I was in high school. I have enjoyed and cherished my memories in the beautiful Sandbox I once called my home. Now, I am in a new adventure with my husband and sons here in Singapore.

I am featuring Expats in different countries every two weeks to share their experiences and adventures with you and me.

I met this featured expat in one of the Blog Meet Sg. Heather was the one who catered for the event. She is a delightful character with winning smile. Get to know her and her business, Fine Palate.

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1.Can you tell us a little bit about yourself and where you are originally from?

I am from Melbourne and my family background is Armenian

Source: Fine Palate

2. What made you move to Singapore? How long have you been here?

I have lived in Singapore for 27years, we came for a two year assignment (my husband and one year old son) with Citibank where my husband was in Global Treasury Department.

3. What do you miss about your home country?

Great outdoors mainly beaches and natural way of life.

4.What are the wonderful discoveries and things you like about in Singapore?

Proximity to other regions and convenience of getting around on a tiny island.

5. What are the 3 tips you can give to fellow expats in Singapore or those you planning to move here?

Make the most of it and get a good network of like-minded friends to ease into life here, in fact it is easier to make friends in Singapore then moving within states as everyone needs to recreate what they left behind, and travel as often as possible to avoid Island fever.

6. The LITTLE MISS HONEY community gets inspired through travel, food and books. Can you tell us your current FAVORITE TRAVEL SPOT, current FAVORITE FOOD/RESTAURANT DISCOVERIES & current FAVORITE BOOK?

My favorite travel spot is Berlin and will always remain so as it is a complete contrast to my work life in Singapore.

My favorite restaurants are Neon Pigeon, Fat Prince, Dingdong.

7. Where do you get your inspirations? Who or what inspires you?

I am a very practical cook and always focus on quality ingredients and apply healthier components into the dish without compromising on taste, i.e., sweet potato as a filler to home made sausages, no palm oil, no packaged sauces, absolutely no life extenders or chemicals of any sort. I am a purist and don’t get over exited about trends or fads

8. Can tell us about your Fine Palate? How did it come about?

Out of pure necessity back in 1990 there were very few options in Singapore for home catering either super low quality local food or 5 star hotels neither suited my style, so started doing my own food, styling and décor for each event, for my husbands work or social occasions for myself and friends, as I realized this is something that really tapped into my creativity, love of cooking and making guests happy, I guess the main thing is I am a ‘compliment junkie’ and love seeing people well taken care of.

8. Can you share with us some of favorite dishes in your catering business?

Too many to mention I love making my gourmet buffet’s where I use mostly seasonal vegetables, fish and meat and serve it at ambient temperature, meaning: cooked very close to event timing and served on platters, I don’t like using chafing dishes, which is so common in Singapore, as it does make it very easy for caterers to cook and send food out hours before the event and be done with it, which does not result in a tasty or hot meal by the time the guests eat it.

Food whoever makes it must be looked in the right way until the last bite is consumed.

9. Give us tips some entertaining tips for home parties.

This will be in a book I have been working on ‘watch this space’ 😉

However here is the most important;

The best tip I can give is to entertain with generosity, make your guests

Feel they are welcome and important and spend as much time as possible with them, once they arrive stop fretting over details and just focus they will forget all else expect how they felt at the party and how much fun they had.

10.Lastly, can you share with what is your inspirational mantra in life?

I choose quality over quantity in every aspect of my life.

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Thank you Heather for gracing us with an interview. I love your entertaining tips and can’t wait to try more of the wonderful gourmet dishes of Fine Palate.

For those interested in catering services from Fine Palate, visit the Fine Palate website.

If you are an expat or know any expats who are interested to be featured, drop me a line at littlemisshoneyblog@gmail.com.”

KOREA DAY 5: ITAEWON, N SEOUL TOWER

March 24, 2017 by Little Miss Honey 276 Comments

For Day 5 in Seoul, we headed to Itaewon. Itaewon is known to be a district where you find a lot of expatriates. It is even called the “Special Tourism District” to highlight it as a destination for internationals tend to hang-out. When we got out of MRT, suddenly it snowed! It is such a pretty sight! Snowflakes were on our hair and eyelashes. It was slowly falling from the sky. It felt romantic and poetic.

We searched for Hamilton Hotel because I researched that most of the food establishment are found behind the hotel. The brown bricked hotel was easy to spot. There was indeed a lot of restaurants behind Hamilton Hotel. After a walk on the block, we settled in a BBQ meat restaurant owned by a Caucasian guy called the Rusty’s Smokehouse. It has several floors with narrow wooden stairs. We got a set with pulled pork, marinated beef, buns, sweet potato mash and potato chips. My husband got a beer for himself.

It was a delicious lunch. I definitely recommend you visit to visit Rusty’s Smokehouse.

It was still snowing when we left Itaewon and headed to Myeongdong to N Seoul Tower. It was a long steep walk going to Namsan Park with the pouring snow.

When we finally reached the area where we bought tickets for cable ride to Namsam Park. It cost 8,500 KRW Round Trip per person. The cable ride was crowded but good thing we were at the sides of the cable car so Naj and Fynn can see the surrounding going up.

Reaching there, I got already the N Seoul Tower Observatory tickets through Klook. It cost $9 per person. My kids again got free pass.

Up in the observatory, you get to see Seoul in 360 degrees view. It was a bit foggy through the observatory glass though. There was candy corner on the observatory and Naj was estatic when he saw all the different colorful candies. Of course, we have to buy him a small bag of candies to eat while enjoying the view.

We eventually went down from the tower. There were padlocks with writings on them in the area before going up the tower. It called the love locks similar to that one in Paris. We came prepared. I bought two padlocks for us to placed our names and interlock each other for goodluck.

We headed back to Myeongdong for dinner. But roam around the area first. I bought some sheet masks for myself. We also tried the Castille Cake because we found a long queue on their kiosk. We say it must be good. It is a soft sponge cake that it large enough to be our morning breakfast. We looked for a bbq grill to eat.

We found one somewhere Myeongdong. Ahh, we love Korean BBQ. My hubby got some bear to go along with it. He like eating the juicy bbq meat with rice while I like it wrapped in lettuce leaves with some of the Korean side dishes tucked inside of it.

The staff and owner were so nice. They took turns carrying Fynn so we can eat. It was definitely a happy meal for us. We went back to our hotel, full and satisfied of our beautiful snowy day.