tips

BROKE GIRL’S GUIDE TO LOOKING ELEGANT AND EXPENSIVE

June 27, 2021 by Little Miss Honey

Three lady friends met up at their favourite coffee shop for their monthly get-together. There they are, busy chatting up a storm while drinking their iced coffees. Then suddenly, a woman came in the cafe and the three friends stop their conversation and looked at the woman who came in. The people from other tables also stared at this woman. She wasn’t particularly typically pretty but there is something about her that you can’t just help but stare. The French would call it, “je nais se quois“.

One friend said, “Woah, what I would give to be like that lady. She looks so elegant and confident“

The other friend reply, “It is obvious she is born with a silver-spoon to look perfect like that and have that kind of aura. Gosh, I wish I am rich.”

The third friend chimed in, “Yes, I think she came from a privileged background. But I have good news for you, girls. We can just emulate her even if we don’t have millions in our bank accounts.”

The other two friends looked at each other and asked simultaneously in a low doubting voices, “How?“

The third friend was correct. Even if you may not be born in the upper social classes but you can borrow some “rich girl” tried & true trademarks to achieve that elegance and class they observed from the woman from the coffeeshop. The aura projected by that woman from the coffeeshop has little to do with amount of money in her bank account (who knows she might even be a broke girl like us) but rather the attitude of confident elegance that she exudes that make her so alluring. Because we all know for a fact that not all “rich girls” are classy (Insert names of rich socialites who star in reality TV shows. You know who they are).

So for the sake of discussion here when we are referring to the “rich girl”, we are looking towards the classy elegant women most often born from old money, studied in prestigious school, travelled extensively, may even speak a few languages or two and may even have attended finishing school. You can think of women like Amal Clooney, Kate Middleton, Olivia Palermo and Jamila Musayeva, Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy and many more examples. But honestly, you don’t need millions to look expensive. Here are 15 tips to look effortlessly rich, classy and elegant at all time.

1. Stick to classic fashion

Stick to basic designs. Think of the fashion of Jacqueline Kennedy-Onassis, Audrey Hepburn and Kate Middleton.They stick to classic fashion style. Avoid to trendy style that will go out of style.

2. Sleek healthy hair

There are something about the hair of the elegant rich women. They normally don’t change hairstyle a lot and keep to their signature flattering hairstyle. Look at Anna Wintour, Editor of Vogue Magazine. She always look classy with her signature bob. Posh women normally have their hair in place, no messy out-of-bed hair. They would either put it in a sleek bun or they would let their hair down in either pin-straight hair or soft curls. One thing, you’ll notice is the health of their hair – no split-ends, no dry hair, etc. They definitely stick to their monthly hair appointment religiously.

3. Minimal Makeup or Mastering the art of the no-makeup makeup look

Don’t pile on the makeup or wear too much colours on your eyes or highlighting all features of your face. Practice the art of the no-makeup makeup. Find a lightweight foundation or better yet use a tinted moisturiser to create a good canvas on a well-hydrated face. Try a subtle eyelash extension rather than false eyelashes. Japanese eyelash extension are more natural looking as far as I have tried. Find a good shade of MLBB (My Lips But Better) lipstick that would flatter you. Stick to eyeliner and a well-groomed eyebrows.

If you want a pop of colour, wear a red lipstick that suits you well. Apart from a good thin layer of foundation and strategically applied concealer, leave the whole face bare with your red lips on.

4. Clear Skin

Invest on good skincare products rather than cosmetics. The appealing feature of rich girls are their smooth blemish-free skin which allow them to use lesser makeup too. They usually have monthly or weekly facial appointments. But you can do your weekly exfoliation and facial mask routine at home. I like Skinfood Black Sugar Facial Scrub followed by any of EtudeHouse facial sheet mask. Here in Oman, I do weekly Saeskin Pink Clay Mask. If you have more skin concerns, invest on monthly appointment with a dermatologist for dermabrasion or facials with a reputable aesthetician.

5. Clean nails

Avoid very long claw-like fingernails or God forbid, dirty fingersnails. If you can’t spare time or money for monthly or weekly nail services, just keep you nails short and clean. If you know how to do your nails at home or you can include nail services it in your budget, opt for French manicures or choose neutral nail colours like beige or nude or light pastel colours. You can also choose red color nails or maybe just your toenails as long as you can maintain it. Chip nails are a no-no.

6. Statement sunglasses

There is something about dark sunglasses that makes a person mysterious and elegant. Celebrities are aware of that and uses this trick to look put-together when in public. Also remember Audrey Hepburn in the movie, Breakfast at Tiffany with her big cat-eye sunglasses? Even if you have no makeup on, put a pair of dark sunglasses and you transform your look instantly. You don’t need to buy very expensive ones. Just find a flattering frame that suits your face perfectly.

7. Classic wristwatch

Put on a classic gold or silver watch. Avoid those colourful watches with quirky designs and plastic straps. If you can’t afford to buy expensive watches now (maybe in the future because it can be a good investment piece), check out affordable luxury watches with timeless minimalist designs like Skaagen or Daniel Wellington. Save your money and invest on a Cartier or Rolex next time *wink wink.

8. Neutral colours

When in doubt, choose white or black colours. Better yet, move towards neutral colours like beige, tan, nude, browns. Avoid overly bright colours like neons or huge distracting patterns. This can be a tricky advice because there are some people (like me!) who doesn’t look good in neutral colours like beige and nudes because they would look wash out. To solve this problem, you can carefully choose colours that best compliment your skin tone. Avoid those artificial colours that can look really unflattering.

9 Monochromatic outfits

Similar to neutral colours, you can choose to style yourself in monochromatic outfits. Match the whole outfit in one colour. Be it is all white or all black, it will elevate your look. To create contrast, you can add difference textures to the outfit by matching wool jacket with a silk blouse. I have to add that certain texture of clothings can set you apart and make you look regal and expensive. Avoid synthetic fabrics like nylon or polyester. Choose instead natural fabrics like silk, linen, cotton and wool.

10. Tailored Clothes

One thing that can break an outfit even if it is the most expensive clothing you bought is the fit. Make sure the clothes fit you well especially in the shoulders. It shouldn’t look like it is hanging lifelessly on your body. It must fit your frame perfectly. But it must not be too tight as well. That is why it is best to find an affordable tailor in your neighbourhood. Especially with a petite frame like me, I would need clothes I bought at the mall to be tailored fit for my small frame.

11. Dainty jewelries

Choose dainty jewelries oppose to loud, too obvious jewelries. Some nouveau rich commit this mistake of showing off too much at the same time. Subtlety always exudes elegance. Choose diamond or pearl ear studs. Pearl necklaces are always a great go-to jewelry to project class and opulence. An image consultant said in a workshop I attended that a woman should only wear 5 accessories at a time and that includes her wedding ring. If it is more than 5 accessories, remove one to avoid looking like a Christmas tree.

12. Tuck-in your shirts

This maybe a very simple advice but it does really make a difference. Tucking in your shirts compared to letting it hang loose gives you a put-together look. Even a simple white t-shirt tucked in a dark coloured jeans with loafers, simple jewelry and leather bag, this ensemble can make you looking very casually chic.

13. Well-pressed clothes

One thing that my husband really hates is crumpled clothes. He can’t leave the house if his clothes are not well-pressed or steamed. When we travel, we often check if the hotel we are staying have an iron or else we bring our own iron with us. At home, we have even a steamer for clothes. Even the most expensive dress if not pressed or steamed can look very tacky.

14. Structured bag

Buy a nice quality structured bag. If you can’t afford to splurge on a branded bag, find a good structured leather bag. Take inspiration from Prada Saffiano Tote bag, Christian Dior Lady Dior Bag, Givenchy Antigona bag, and of course the iconic Hermes Birkin and Kelly bags. If you can afford branded bags, stay away from super obvious logos on your bags which translates to flaunting and too obvious. There are some branded bags that are too shapeless to be considered elegant like the Balenciaga GH City bag (To be honest, I like that bag), Louis Vuitton Neverfull (sorry, I know a lot of people has this bag) or Longchamp Le Pilage bag (Haha! I have this bag. Broke girl here), used out of comfort and its roominess. But if you are adamant to follow rich girl guide to elegance, a structured leather bag is the way to go. It doesn’t have to be expensive. Once you can save, invest on one nice structured branded bag. No need to buy a closet full of bags, one or maybe two is enough.

15. Mind your manners and practice good etiquette

One thing also that sets the elegant ladies apart is their demeanour. You don’t hear vulgar or loud voices from them (Maybe closed door, who know?). They are expert in social graces, always with a smile, a please and a thank you, walking the room with good posture and undeniable finesse. Get a book of Ms. Emily Post, an author and socialite from the 1970’s. She wrote extensive material on etiquette. I heard about her from my mother who reads her book when she was still a little girl. Also cultivate kindness. Kindness is always a wonderful virtue to embody. Be kind to everyone, whatever their social ranking in life. You know a well-brought up person is someone who is nice to the big bosses of the company and also nice to the janitors for the company.

There you have it, 15 tips to look elegant and expensive. The purpose of this post does not aim to seek materialism or superficiality, which I would never advocate. Rather, we aim to aspire the elegance and class that these well-raised rich girls emanate. No need to be like the three friends wishing and hoping to be that girl in the coffee shop, covering with a smidge of envy and self-pity because we can always work toward being “that girl” – the elegant classy rich girl. *wink.

12 MENTAL HEALTH CARE TIPS DURING THE COVID 19 OUTBREAK

September 8, 2020 by Little Miss Honey

If there is one thing we are currently learning from this pandemic is the importance of mental health care. A boat load of mixed emotions, often negative, emerged during these time of uncertainty and new changes. There are feelings of anxiety, depression, boredom, anger and many more that are waging within us. We need to take better care of our mental health during these times.

mental health care tips during covid 19 outbreak

Here are 12 Mental Health Care Tips for you and me:

1. Tell yourself that it is okay not to be okay

In situation of extreme stress such as this, it is okay to acknowledge the fact that we are not okay and it is okay not be okay. Denying the dilemma that we all are facing can only unhealthily suppress the bottled negative emotions we have inside, causing more problems. Allow yourself to feel your emotions, sleep in and take things slowly. Disregarding our negatives emotions will only promote toxic positivity which doesn’t help at all. Venting your emotions to some you trust or a mental health professional would really be beneficial too.

2. Enjoy healthy activities that you enjoy and find relaxing

Engage in healthy activities like reading, exercise, eating healthy foods, napping, praying and spending time with family can boost positive mental health during this time. Find a habit that you enjoy and use this time to allow yourself to immerse yourself in those activities.

3. Lessen expectations

Lessen expectations with self and family members at home. Though we are given an opportunity to stay often at home which allows us more time for ourselves, give yourself a break by not condemning yourself like if you miss a workout today. Same goes with your spouse, your kids and other family members at home. We are all coping these days. No need to berate your spouse if he forgot to take out the trash or she gets more impatient with the kids lately. Be more understanding if your kids are acting up more these days because being coop up inside the house can be too restricting for their hyperactive energies. Besides Shakespeare once said that, “Expectations is the root of all heartache.” So lessen your expectations to avoid or at least, lessen heartaches and mental anguish.

4. Practice compassion towards self and others

Like #3, practice more compassion towards yourself and other. Forgive yourself if you mess up and don’t burden yourself too much. Be kinder to everyone. What is happening around us is call to return to kindness. We all need learn to be kind to one another and also to ourselves. There is a study that random acts of kindness can boost happiness levels. Even with social distancing, we can still do random acts of kindness in our own way by reaching out digitally to those who may need cheering up, donating to those who are in need and providing services like free zoom talks or classes on our topic of expertise. I know of one marketing agency that provides free video styling for business owners that she knows are struggling because of this pandemic.

5. Be mindful with social media consumption

Being on social media these days or watching/reading the news can cause more anxiety. Hence, I lay off from most of my social media accounts lately. Another study suggested lessening of social media consumption can increase happiness as well. A tip, if you are still not willing to delete your social media, is to focus on facts than fear during social media consumption. We can turn our attention towards the positives we see in social media. There is a cool hashtag in Twitter that you can check out to be inspired called #covidkindness.

6. Do meditation

Another mental health care tip that would benefit you now and even post-covid 19 is meditation. Meditation is a practice where an individual uses a technique – such as mindfulness, or focusing the mind on a particular object, thought, or activity – to train attention and awareness, and achieve a mentally clear and emotionally calm and stable state. There are several ways to meditate. One good one is the Loving Kindness Meditation. Think of a person that you love or care for a lot and repeat the mantra over and over , “May you be happy. May you be healthy“. You can also try other meditation apps like Calm, Headspace or Simple Habit. For me, I prefer to connect it with my faith and being a Catholic, I use the Catholic meditation app called Hallow.

7. Practice physical distance but do not be socially distant

Just because we are practicing physical distancing that doesn’t mean we become a recluse and avoid any contact to anyone outside our home at all cost. Connectedness towards other is even more essential these days. We need to reach out to our parents, siblings, our relatives and our close friends. Take time to check up on them. Create zoom parties. I even saw a farewell party done through zoom meeting for a colleague that will be transferring to another company. Everyone got dressed up, all have wine glasses to toast and a lovely meal in each homes. We all need that sense of togetherness despite not being physically together to hurdle this circumstance that we are all in right now. This is the best time to reconnect with long lost friends too.

8. Appreciate time affluence

One of the sad repercussion of this outbreak are the retrenchment, unemployment and business losses of companies. I knew of a few people that were laid off from work and some of my friends’ businesses closing. I encourage who experiencing these to do #1. Cry, get angry, vent out, lie down on the couch & binge watch on Netflix show. Do what you need to do to cope in this trying times. Learn to take advantage of the gift of time affluence. We are given more time for ourselves. This abundance of time will give us the time to hibernate, rest, experiment with new healthy activities we haven’t had the time to try out, realign to what we are passionate about, create strategic plans of what we want to do once we go back on our feet and live life slowly. Upside of time affluence is that it can sometimes provide with the clarity that you often couldn’t achieve in a fast paced life.

9. Journaling

Jotting down your free flowing thoughts can be therapeutic. Many realisations can arise from this practice. Vent out all your anxieties, sadness, hopefulness and plans in a paper. It has reap many benefits to a lot of people.

10. Move your body

Find an exercise that you enjoy. You can even just a walk around the house or dancing silly to your favourite tune inside your house. Moving your body can result to release of endorphins which acts on the opiate receptors of our brains which can result to a happy mood.

11. Create consistent routine

If you are feeling uneasy and especially those suffering from anxiety, creating a consistent routine would help in this scenario. In spite of the uncertainty that is happening around the world, having a sense of control and consistency can provide a calming and reassuring effect. Design energising morning and relaxing evening rituals for yourself. This can be extra helpful for your kids too if you create a morning and evening rituals they will look forward to. Have a consistent waking and sleeping time and this will help regulate your sleep. There are a lot of people experiencing insomnia these days. That being said, it is best to practice good sleep hygiene by having a conducive room atmosphere for sleeping, no caffeine after 6 PM and no cellphone 2 hours before bedtime.

12. Practice gratitude

Lastly, writing down gratitude list daily can improve mental well-being and increase happiness. Shifting focus on the things that we are blessed to have can tweak our brains into a more positive mindset. We get to have feelings of appreciation and abundance once we see how much we have to still be thankful for.

Pro tip for frontliners:

Here are bonus tips for front liners like me. If overwhelmed and discouraged, try this out:

Take a 1-minute break
Then do 3 slow conscious breaths
Also you can do reframing of your mind on what you are doing & what you are contributing to the community

I hope these tips can all help you as we cope this pandemic. Take care everyone!

PRACTICING THE ART OF GRATITUDE EVERYDAY

July 25, 2018 by Little Miss Honey 789 Comments

We are often told to always be grateful and that we must practice the art of gratitude. When we were young, we are often ask, “What are the magic words?” after we are handed out something and our little young selves would readily reply, “Thank you!” But I came to realised now that I am older the words “Thank you” are indeed magical. That act of gratefulness was subtly engrained in us when we were young but we never understand how it is to be truly grateful.

I remember in my 2nd year high school Values Class, our teacher who is a nun, taught us the importance of Gratitude. She shared a story of a lady who practice it daily. The lady would thank God from the minute she woke up, from the beauty of the sun, the little blessings that she have in her life (that is often taken for granted by most people) up to the comforts of having a bed to sleep as the day closes. I was inspired by the story that I tried to be more grateful with all the little things that God has blessed me and appreciate everything that has been given to me. I sometimes would create a Gratefulness List after every month or sometimes I would enumerate the 3-5 things that I am grateful for that day. But of course from time to time, I would often forget practicing it and discontentment would set in.

But recently, during the last stages of my pregnancy and after I have given birth to Zeke, I started thinking about God’s blessings that he has generously bestowed upon my life. I felt like a spoiled horrible daughter who was showered with so much gifts by her loving forgiving Father. I felt ashamed and undeserving of all His love and generosity. So I started thanking God as much as I can. I started appreciating all of his blessings in my life. From the blessing of family, my wonderful healthy & loving kids, the opportunity to experience living in Singapore, the gift of employment, genuine & supportive friends, the wellness of my family back home, the beautiful scenery of Singapore, being able to blog & to earn from it and all the many little wonderful gifts God has given me. I realised I was given so much blessing that I have no right to complain about little discomforts like back pain from carrying heavy bags with breastmilk pumping paraphernalia, long tiring walks to & fro work,unruly kids, and all the grumbles that didn’t fit in my fairy tale concept of what life should be. Humans are predisposed to have a bottomless desires so satisfaction & contentment are hard to chase.

So How Can We Practice Gratitude in Our Daily Lives?

Gratitude is not merely saying “Thank You!”. The spirit of gratefulness must go beyond the act of spitting out words that resembles being thankful. To be truly grateful, it must be part of you and your being would reflect the positive aura of gratitude.

First, we must Stop Complaining. Complaining goes against the principle of gratitude. How can you feel grateful if your brain and mouth are full of complains, from how hot the weather is, to not having enough money, to be unfortunate that you have insensitive workmates or how crowded the public transportation is and the list goes on. When we do that we encourage the bad vibe of discontentment. This would result in misery and not reap the benefits of gratitude.

Together with not complaining, we should also Look at the Good Side of Everything. Remember that lesson on seeing the glass half full and seeing the glass half empty. A thirsty person who is ungrateful and was given a glass of water would say, ” I am so damn thirsty, why would you just give me so little water to drink!” A thirsty person who practice gratitude would say to the person who gave him water, “Wow! I needed this so badly. I love that it is super chilled. ” followed by a sincere “Thank you!” See the difference? Both were given the same amount of water but their reactions differ. The grateful one even appreciated that he was given a cold drink. I assumed the ungrateful one wouldn’t even noticed the water handed to him was chilled.

Grateful people often Smile. Grateful people are happy people because they feel blessed. They don’t see nor acknowledged the lack but they focused on the abundance. Because of their radiant glow from being grateful, they attract positivity and abundance in their lives. Hence, there will be more thanksgiving which would result to more abundance. What a wonderful cycle to be in, right?Who wouldn’t like to smile with that? Some people would call them lucky. But in reality, it is just due to the simple act of gratitude.

Another habit that grateful people have is Acknowledging the Blessings or Creating a Gratefulness List. I try my best to practice this but truly grateful people have this habit down pat. Some, at the end of the day, would have a Prayer of Thanksgiving to God for all the blessings they received throughout the day. They would enumerate the blessings they have received. Some do it in the morning upon waking where they say all the things they are grateful for as they start their day. Some like me who likes making lists, would write down the things we are grateful for, either by the end of the day, start of the morning or after every end of the week or after every end of the month.

Lastly, because you are grateful for having so much (when in fact for an ungrateful person, they think you are crazy for thinking you have so much), you have this urge to Give Back. People who practice gratitude would have this nagging urge to give back because they feel they need to share it. So monetary-wise and depending on your faith, you can practice tithing. Based in the bible, it is the practice of giving 10% of your earnings to God. And often when you tithe, blessings come back ten-folds. You can donate it in a religious sect or a charity organisation of your choice. You can also give extra money to your family members who are not financially stable or your elderly parents who does not have any source of income. But make sure that this generosity should not encourage laziness or complacency among family members and relatives that are healthy, young and capable to find a source of income for themselves. You can also sponsor underprivileged children or persons that may need your help in their education, necessities, etc.

The act of giving back doesn’t only mean giving money. You can give back by volunteering your time and skills to good causes and charitable events. You can tutor kids who aren’t able to go to school. Offering your help in medical missions would be awesome way of giving back. You can assess what your talents are. Say you are a good singer, join the church choir. Say you are a good cook, you can look for feeding programs where you can cook for the poor. Giving back can be as easy as offering help to a frail old lady to carry her heavy grocery bags as you were both going up the bus or offering your seat to an elderly man in the train.

Be a blessing to others and in turn, blessings will be given to you unexpectedly. Good begets good. Positivity begets positivity. It is how it works. I realised if I am more thankful with the things that I have, more wonderful things come. When I complain more, allowing discontentment & negativity to set in and operating in a sense of lack, blessings & opportunities are taken away.

So, let us all try to practice the art of gratitude. Let us be thankful that we are given a life to live, a world as our playground, a variety of people that we can choose to be our playmates in this funny world and resources to enjoy. To those who read this article, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I feel blessed that I get to share this realisation with you.